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I'd noticed a sign at the Theatre that claimed the actors would appear out to sign autographs at 6pm. I assumed this was for, er, phase actors and not an actor like Sir Patrick. I'd remaining the theatre, went three actions to the cinema queue to meet up with Mitch and our mate Ian and then I turned and discovered that a line was forming again at the theatre.

Then there's the biggie - young children. Any male can make a infant, but it takes a real chav to shirk all accountability thereafter. Chavettes, meanwhile, don't turn into a chavette until they're wielding a buggy. Right up until then, they're like Padwans to the Jedi - only thicker and inclined to violence. So whatsoever you do, make sure you either plant or get an adolescent seed nicely before your twenties. That way, you're a shoo-in for council housing, whilst those hardworking suckers you the moment called friends are slugging their guts out to save for a deposit. How thick are they?!

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BM: Effectively, l'm certain Cher and Darlene were being there. Perhaps all of The Blossoms. Truly, Bobby and I have been out of town the weekend that Phil overdubbed the voices.

BM: He in no way did it in front of me. If I realized he was carrying out it I would made him end; not that I'm a prude or everything, but arrive on, sixty three yrs previous.